It just so happens that this movie was WAYYYYY funnier than I had anticipated.

I had a great time watching it in the company of a jar of almond butter.

As a seasoned stripper, I’d like share with the world some very important opinions I have regarding the realisticness and relatability of the role of Erin Grant (played by megababe Demi Moore)

Things to which I can relate:

• The bouncer not being there when you need him because he’s busy reading The Wall Street Journal with a monkey on his shoulder.
• Dancing to songs that I find to be really sexy and no one else does.
• Being employed by a greasy, tasteless boss who hates his job, his life, and his bizarrely shaped head.
• Demi and I are both fans of Real Girl underwear!
• Everything that happens in the beginning of this scene. 

Things to which I cannot relate:

• Feeling sympathetic towards a guy who jumps on stage to grab onto you like a toddler, and subsequently gets knocked out by Burt Reynolds. I would have given Burt the best blowjob of reciprocity right there on the stage.
• Looking sexy in overalls. I will never achieve this. I’ve tried. Fuck have I tried.

• Standing up to the aforementioned greasy, tasteless boss, unless of course I want my feet planted in cement and to be subsequently dropped into the Hudson river.
• You know the scene when the boss welcomes the new talent to the girls in the dressing room, and they all applaud and put their arms around her? THAT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN IN ANY STRIP CLUB ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD. (Ladies, if you can prove me wrong, please do and I’ll hop on the next flight to get there)
• When I was a kid, I always wanted to jump rope with strippers. I am insanely jealous of Rumer Willis.

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